Observer Effect

Miles Zimmerman May 29, 2017 Hawthorne was tired. Yet the whole world was right outside—sleep felt wasteful. But it was cold, so Hawthorne rifled through his closet for the smoking jacket. “Testacles spectacles wallet and watch” he mumbled to himself, in this instance referring to his cigarettes, headphones, lighter, and shoes. All accounted for. To observe something is to change it—his roommate was ranting his … Continue reading Observer Effect

Spring is like a Borderline Girlfriend

Nathan Le Master April 7, 2017 Spring is like a borderline girlfriend One day nice and pleasant The next cold and aloof Buds bursting with sexual innuendo She’s wearing a loose dress Leafy green lavender and pink Encircled by a noxious yellow aura She slaps you across the face Makes your vision blurry Makes snot run all over Your sleeves are disgusting You made me do this Fuck … Continue reading Spring is like a Borderline Girlfriend

Summer Sheep Baa Nah: An Ode to NYC Summertime

Summer Sheep Baa Nah New York summer heat, The heat that hugs you With wool blankets Even when you said you’ve had enough. But I’m not cold, you say. The summer’s sheep baa nah. Their wooly exteriors need shearing. Will you be the one that deprives them of this pleasure? One of the few summer sheep pleasures. Do it for these burdened made-up sheep. Sheep … Continue reading Summer Sheep Baa Nah: An Ode to NYC Summertime

How to Get Angry a Lot

How to Get Angry a Lot Forget that you might ever had done anything wrong yourself. Take things personally: that computer broke down to be mean. Constantly compare your existence with that of the happiest, most fortunate people you know. Expect that there cannot ever be traffic, and that household keys simply can’t go missing. Build up isolated frustrations into giant interconnected narratives of persecution. … Continue reading How to Get Angry a Lot